Mr. Brown Goes to Washington-Allez Cuisine: White House Style

Alton Brown and Iron Chef America recently filmed at the White House with Michelle Obama. For additional info, see the New York Times article.

"What Can You Tell Me About The Egg?"

There I was.
Standing at the stainless steel food prep table, cracking a case and a half eggs - (that's 270 eggs to you and me) - cracking them two at a time into a giant Cambro container, when one of the cooks I admire walks over, picks up an egg, and asks...

"So, what can you tell me about the egg?"

I look up and see him holding the little white egg, index finger on the top, thumb on the bottom, shaking it slightly for effect, and just barley holding it up to the light.

All he needed was a German accent.

Or, French.
Yeah, it would be French in the movie.

Now, this guy has a rocking sense of humor, but you have to earn the right to hear it.

He speaks little.
Listens much.

And, when he does utter something it's either very important and well thought-out...or it's the best pun you've heard all week.

And, there he was.
Holding the egg up to the light.

"So, what can you tell me about the egg?"

I smile.
Alton Brown has prepared me for this moment.
"Well..."
I can name 5 parts to an egg.
The shell, which is porous.
The albumin.
The yolk.
The membranes.
And, the chalaze, this stringy part.

"More?" I ask while I cracking the eggs.
"Continue," he says.

OK.
I know of 3 grades of eggs.

Grade AA are the freshest, they have perky yolks with a tight membrane around them.

Grade A are a bit older.

Grade B eggs have yolks that will likely burst when they hit the pan, so they are bad for fried eggs.

I look up.
He's just smiling.

If you want a very smooth scramble, you can strain out the chalaze.

And, if you give me a raw egg and a hard boiled one, I can tell you which one is which, by spinning them on a table, then stopping them and removing my hands. The one that continues spinning is the raw egg.

Again, I look up.
He's listening, and waiting, wiggling the egg from side to side.

We now have a bit of an audience.
Someone is standing behind him,
And the person to my right stops chopping fruit to listen.

But...judging by the way you are holding that egg...

What you REALLY want to hear is...

It is virtually impossible to crack an egg by pressing only on the top and bottom of the egg - without cheating a little and applying a bit of pressure to the sides of the shell.

He smiles.
And, gently returns the egg to the case beside me.

Later he passes by.
I'm still cracking eggs.
(A case and a half is a lot of eggs.)

"Anything else?" I ask.

"An ostrich egg, how do you open that?"
He yells from across the prep area.

"Across the middle, the equator, usually with a hacksaw,"
I respond, mumbling a quiet 'thank you' to to the creators of Iron Chef America and Masaharu Morimoto who I have seen open plenty of ostrich eggs.

Later, he walks up to me for one last question.
"Why is the shell porous?"

"Because the little chicky needs oxygen," I tease.

He smiles. (Did I see a slight nod?)
Satisfied, he walks away.

I laughed, out loud just a bit - much more on the inside - because I knew I could have waxed poetic for at least 5 minutes more on the Incredible Edible Egg.

Why...I hadn't yet mentioned that...
Heat is extremely important in cooking eggs. Low and slow for fluffy scrambled and higher for fried.

The egg is an great emulsifier. The yolk is fat and the white is protein.

It's a "complete protein."

The average hen, gallus domesticus, can produce one egg a day every day of the year.

And, that's just a start...to the wonders of the egg.

So, thank you, Alton Brown.
For the egg education I have received over the years.
For helping me make good eats.

And, for making the cook smile... and, not break an egg in my face.
*grin*

While looking for a picture of Alton with an egg...
I found this video.
I hope you enjoy it.

BTW, yes, after cracking all those eggs,
your fingers do get pruney.

Now, "Go wash those chickeny hands!"
And, enjoy the video below.

Iron Chef America - The Video Game?

Appears there is an Iron Chef America video game on the brink of release by the company Destineer Studios. It was recently listed on Gamestop's website for DS and Wii formats, and then it was pulled.

Hopefully, it will be released soon.

Couple of interesting points.
1) In the video(shown below) the voiceover is not Alton Brown.
Perhaps he's in the actual game, though. If not, well, there goes my sale.

2) The newest Iron Chef, Michael Symon is included.

3) The video shown is a commercial for Food Network - I haven't seen it air yet, but good to see they are getting their money's worth.

Video trailer (if my embed ever fails)and additional information can be found here.

Hmm, to Wii or DS...
That is the question.

All I Want for Christmas...is a Cooking Channel

Dear Santa,
I've been good.
And, I've been thinking.

All I want for Christmas is a "Cooking Channel."

(Not sure if you get the "Food Channel" up there in the North Pole,
But - as their slogan says - they are "Way More Than Cooking.")

And, I want cooking.

I want Alton Brown teaching the whys with the hows.

And, Rick Bayless showing how to use real chiles in my Mexican and Yucatecan dishes.

Jacques Pépin demonstrating how to French stuff up without being snooty.

Julia (Ms. Child needs no last name) in her French Chef series to teach me sauces and show me chickens in their full chickendom.

Christopher Kimball and America's Test Kitchen to do some of the legwork.

Lidia Bastianich demonstrating that Italian food can be simple, hearty and good.

And, can you please toss in Mario Batali to give the man's side of that same message?

For dessert, can I please have Gale Gand making....anything?

I don't need more EVOO.
Or, ways to semi-make anything.
I don't need to see vacation spots.
Or, to know how to eat on $40 in any city.
And, honestly, I have had it up to *here* with the competitions.
(Although, I will make an exception for Iron Chef America...since they show cooking.)

Santa, I appreciate that I can get some these things...
Some of the time...

From PBS.
PBS Create.
The Food Network - when the planets properly align.
And, from my local library by way of DVD.

But, pleeeeease, Santa, can't I just have a channel?
One silly little channel...
Devoted to cooking healthy meals?

A "Cooking" Channel...that isn't "Waaaaay More Than Food"?

Merry Christmas to you and yours,
Dana

P.S.
I hope you enjoy the PB Fudge, Santa.
It's an Alton Brown recipe.
*grin*

Iron Chef America - Battle: Holiday Disaster

Food Network is working overtime parading around their "Talent." As if re-running all the holiday shows from past years isn't painful enough...

Last night we were subjected to a FN All-Star Invasion of Kitchen Stadium of massive proportions in the style of Iron Chef America: Battle Holiday Desserts.

Wait, no it was Battle Sugar.
I guess you can just change the name to Holiday Desserts when the focus groups don't eat up Battle Sugar.

Paula Deen, Iron Chef Cat Cora and sous chef Lori Lynn Bauer v. Chef Tyler Florence, Chef Robert Irvine and sous chef (I believe it was) Andrew. (I'll re-watch the tape and update his name.)

"Let the Battle Begin!"

Some random thoughts...

Paula took no time in showing Cat who was alpha - first jibe was in their sit down intro.

I noticed that Cat and Tyler kept their heads down, working. Wonder if Paula and Robert were the "designated" jokers, or if that just came naturally.

By the time Paula bit Robert's finger, I was ill.

Two words.
Processed. Cheese.
(Are you KIDDING me?)

I enjoyed the Alton's disaccharide diagram of glucose and fructose - H-OH-H-OH-H-OH. Geeky festive fun.

(For extra credit, I think Alton should've drawn the chemical composition of the cheese - he would have needed extra blackboards.)

Poor Alton. He managed to avoid this year's "All-Star Holiday Special" (the one with him in it is a re-run) but still they brought the mountain to Mohammad and joined him in Kitchen Stadium. *Sigh*

I could be wrong...but, I think Paula's throwing the flour at the camera really peeved Alton off. If nothing else, it angered me. First, it wasn't kindergarten. Second, that's a piece of expensive equipment.

Alton appeared speechless (!) at the antics. Hence, the whole, "Kevin, let's you and me get some coffee" comment.

And, that's a shame.
Since AB can wax poetic on the miracles of sugar.
Instead he was relegated to color man for a food fight.

Speaking of fighting, I don't think Lori Lynn, the sous chef, found Paula's comments about her the least amusing. And, I thought the retort Lori Lynn made was to Paula. (But, I could have heard that wrong. Perhaps it was to Robert.)

To be fair, I loved the creativity in Tyler's christening Robert's failed ice cream, Crème Anglaise.

Yeah, Cat and Paula made 7 dishes, but come on.
One dish was slicing open the a huge 12 inch tall loaf of Challa and inserting one inch of cream and strawberries. Wow, stayed up all night for that recipe, eh, gals? Pandering. Instead they should have taken the time to make a nice Jewish dessert. I'm not Jewish, but if I were, I don't think that sticking pink marshmallows (even homemade) in a blue bag would qualify as honoring Hanukkah, either.

I didn't see Cat bother with her customary ouzo shot at the end of the battle. I guess she saves that for real battles.

I was sad for Tyler when his Bouche De Noel flopped flat and he basically served the judges a Boston Creme Pie. He isn't a pastry chef and he was pushed for time. I get that.

Was that a spark I saw between Tyler Florence and judge, Tina Fey? Too bad they are both happily married. Could have saved money on the monogrammed towels.

But, seriously folks...
I really think FN should keep the hilarity out of Kitchen Stadium.
The Giada/RR thing was bad enough.

I really wish they would have saved Battle Sugar for pastry chefs who could do the ingredient justice. It could have been amazing. Instead it was a processed cheese fudge stuck in a sugar-filled shot glass, and a Bouche de No-log.

This was one uninspiring battle.
And, I won't be attempting any of these dishes.
I'm out of Velveeta.